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Thursday, July 26, 2012

KISSING SPREE..

Hello my people, long time here, hope you're all fine, I know you're not missing me, well I don't miss you too :p..

To the business of the day, some of you know how much I like kissing....oh yea, SERIAL KISSER....as much as I'm not proud of it, I've learnt a lot... so this post is about guys/men I've kissed and the manner.

Names are replaced with letters.

Mr A...This one was a first time kiss, his tongue,gums,lips and jaws reached my throat...saliva was everywhere and at some point I was like, can someone get AIDS through kissing?

Mr B...This one....halitosis,...I don't know if he hadn't brushed his mouth that day but it seemed like he has never seen a toothbrush.....he tasted like odara....sorry,make that Cabai...that stuff used for killing snakes, I don't even know the taste, that's what came into my mind. I couldn't eat that day.

Mr E... This one was a shark!!!! my poor tilapia mouth suffered, I was gasping for air, it was like nails were puncturing my mouth, People, I cried. this was a near death experience.

Mr S.... I'm tempted to mention his name oh SA.... This idiot ate Suya and yahooza before kissing me, all my lips were on fire and he didn't let go for 10 full minutes... for that whole night...my lips were red.

Mr V...VICTOR....this one is a Vampire...as in literally...I swear, I spat blood later.... I had to ask him if he was doing assignment.

Mr S also ate pepper soup to kiss me once oh....the guy likes pepper.

Another Mr A.... I vomitted.. He ate garlic! Help me say Ew...he is a good kisser but I threw up. GARLIC...God forgive him.

Mr I... I thought I kissed an angel....I did littlke, he did most of the work...that one they call *lips massage* unforgettable!!!

The one that kept saying don't stop pleaseeee...at the Cinema...people were giggling....shame hasn't been greater, for just kiss oh.

My Ex... he was amazing....I could kiss him for hours.

my Bff....Let me mention him, EE, he was the best!!!! I would like to describe it but I don't want to miss him. His saliva taste like honey! I'm not kidding>>>you could put it in bread and eat....ha!!!

Then the normal ones....boring kisses...after 5 mins,game is up, the ones tht want to pray before they kiss are the most annoying, breathing hard and calling *Lord* and I even laughed out one time so, dude said I was mocking him.

Mr O.....this one na Cat...his beards scratched my face...seriously.

This is all I can remember, there'll be vol 2.
Please oh...I don't go below the belt..its B.. figure that out :p

Anybody wanna share? :d

I will do anything to kiss Channing Tatum...just kiss, I don't want to get over him...any help?

Love all of you....special kisses from the serial killer...sorry kisser.
XoXo

10 comments:

Fragilelooks said...

Serial Kisser. lol.
some adventure.......... wish i could remember what my kissing experiences are like.

scar said...

i must say u hv bad luck meeting good kissers so dnt stop till u meet the best kissers rather than lame ones.

Toinlicious said...

Lmao, girl, you're crazy. You've apparently kissed more frogs than princes. And why do people do the garlic thing though. It's just so bleh

And Mr. 'don't stop pleaseee' is soo cute hehehe

smh, serial kisser indeed. I wonder if you've ever kissed a girl though...you know, just for fun

gretel said...

Lool...@ scar...I have stopped oh,even serial killers stop kiLling...I hope a good kisser comes around
@ Toin...sisi...you want me to say something I didn't want to talk about abi *evils*

SAMUEL EKUNDAYO said...

Serial kisser! lol
Wait, its hard to keep kissing tales especially when you have such long list, mehn! Gretel, you are on FIRE! lol

Toin got you there! When are you going to tell us about the one with the girl? lol

- LDP

gretel said...

lmao....LDP pour water on me ohy...don't mind Toin...she dey pinch my mouth

DiDi said...

Greatel Almighty,i never knew you were a serial kisser lol .. Anyway keep posting and spare the guys small..lol

Myne Whitman said...

Where is part 2 please, the one with girls? You this girl eh? LOL...

Ginger said...

lmao!!
You have kissed plenty frogs my girl.

I have un-fond memories of a Mr Slobber. The guy could produce quantum amounts of spittle. urgh. suffice to say there was a ban on kissing.

Uche (@UcheAnne) said...

Em, is it weird that I've only kissed two people? *runs away*

Seriously hilarious. But using someone's spit in bread...?! Lol.