Friday, May 3, 2013

Hi keekdolls “in Kim K’s voice”. I’m at Iguaca falls with my friends *pouts*, it’s so swell here I hope the world ends! The crab here rocks so tey Kemi had to *steal* some into her purse “RME”. Who does that? I think I spotted Channing Tatum and Idris Elba, I think I just defined orgasm. “blinking lashes’’. Kemi don come get Chinco bobo, me I’m here forming sophisticated. Sophisticated doesn’t buy data bundle, crab or Peruvian hair, if I –‘’
36 seconds over. Brah.
Other than the heart break Barca gave me yesterday, I’m fine. So fine, I knack my head on the wall uncountable times. I’m still Team Barcelona sha.
@Toinlicious and @Coyintrovert, these two waddup waddup gangsters dey craze sha. Toin will form bis geh and Coy oyibo my bum, they will be stroking Gretel, when I get my special pepper spray, I’m mixing it in Toin”s cream and Coy’s pap. Yes, she eats pap. Gross!
Erm! I’m tempted to mention that hair nazi that mentioned me in her blog but I won’t, there’s no space for lazy oldies on here. Too much energy.
So, I’ve been on and about chics I’ve kissed. I AM NOT A LESBIAN. Before one mbgeke will come and talk about mixed personality. I will take my time and handle you. Like I said earlier, girls are better kissers. They are sentimental and passionate and they are not rushing to go further. Just kiss. So…!
First time I kissed a girl was at my 200 level in Uni, was in the library and this hoochie walks in, walks up to me and plants a kiss on my lips. Shock no gree make I shout. Next thing she started apologizing, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I’ve just really always wanted to do that”. I can’t forget it oh. There and then I knew I had lips worth kissing.
Valentine’s day, I sat out with loads of friends at a beach and we did ‘’truth and dare’’. You know you spoil the fun when you resist or you’re out. I chose “dare’’. I heard stuff my friends asked those that chose “truth’’ and I thought I was sharp. Before this people will ask me if I shave my pubic hair and I will go sick.
That’s how the lead questionnaire *may God forgive him* said ‘’Kiss IT or drop into the swimming pool with all your dress and accessories”. I was weak. And I was so so dressed. I started begging oh. Please let me pay money, any amount. My guy said 50k. Ewu Gambia. 50k because I won’t kiss a girl. Anyways we kissed.
This episode has happened twice or so and that thing they say every girl has a lesbian tendency is a huge fallacy. Trust me, it is. People even speculated that we enjoyed the kiss so much we would make out later, Bleh!
Another episode oh, I went to see my friend, Debby. That’s how her pervert brother started talking about how he likes seeing girls kiss. These gists are always really awkward but we kept at it. Next thing, Debby asked him, so if you see two girls kiss now, what will you do? O MA GA O! The guy provoke. The offer was so enticing, I rushed to Debby. We had a long laugh but I had what I wanted.
Miss K, my dear friend don lick essential balm kiss me. The kind hot slap she received spoilt the fun. We were both crying.
Then…. I’ve kissed my good friend. I don’t have bestie. I really wanted her to know how much she meant to me. I regret it till today. The girl has used it to label me and attack me like mad. She was so shocked she didn’t sleep. Then she told me, no wonder guys won’t leave your mouth. Hehe. Na god, shey.
It has finished.
For all it’s worth, let peace reign. I love you guys too much. Esp, my “le boo” Didi. YIMU. LOL.